On the Big Muddy River in Jackson County, there lived in the “Old Days” a well-to-do family who had a beautiful daughter, who was admired by young men for miles around. He came there to court a young man of the neighborhood one winter’s evening, dressed in the best that pioneer life could afford. As, of course, always when a young man goes to see his best daughters, the hours fly by and it is time for him to go home, but it begins to rain and he is persuaded to stay the night. When he was shown his apartment, he ordered the pretty girl to “goodnight,” hastily undressed, dropped his ass to the floor, quickly settled into a warm, warm bed, and, when it was too late, quickly fell asleep.
It became a cold and windy night. Rain and sleet fell into his room and covered his entire ass, and many entered. As it got colder, his breeches were so frozen that he made them stand on their own. Imagine his consternation, if you can, when he awoke the next morning and found his Sunday ass in that condition. What was he to do? what would you do? He tried to put them on, but that was out of the question. Taking them in his hands, he went to the room of the girl’s father and mother, where there was the only stove-fire in the house. He sat them on the bolster to melt and dry while he went back to bed. It seemed trouble enough to him, but it was only the beginning, for as they melted by the fire, they naturally fell that way and fell into it. Finally, the father began to smell burning skin and jumped out of bed, but it was too late to save the young man’s breeches. You have received damage that cannot be used. The young man was informed of the incident but what could he do but stay in bed until another pair was fixed for him and that is exactly what he did. The father came to his rescue and lent him a pair, and without much ceremony the boy turned his steps into the house. Only what the girl thought of this extraordinary performance, neither history nor tradition tells us, but we are told that it was a long time before he even dared to look at the girl again and that he finally married another girl! Waller.
Suede clothing in the Old West